


Always

by humblydefiant



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Control Ending, M/M, mShenko
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-05
Updated: 2016-11-05
Packaged: 2018-08-29 06:10:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8478286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/humblydefiant/pseuds/humblydefiant
Summary: Kaidan has been noticing something strange about the Reapers' behavior lately. Can he communicate with them? Will he finally find out what happened to Shepard? He is determined to find out. A quick one shot. Inspired by this piece of artwork by @zuzarti on Tumblr.





	

Kaidan pushed out into the frigid night. The cold gnawed at his bare skin as he walked out onto the rooftop of his high rise. The rolled up sleeves and pant legs of Shepard’s old fatigues served as a reminder of Shepard’s shorter limbs but they did little to protect him from the punishing December sky.

Didn’t matter. He didn’t wear them for comfort.

A pair of Reapers hovered above him, seemingly unaware of his presence. His stomach spat up bile into his esophagus - an involuntary response. Reapers no longer caused him the fear they once did but his body remembered the old times.

He checked his clock - 23:20. Just a few more minutes now. He rubbed an agitated thumb against the hand lamp he carried.

The city of Vancouver spilled out below him until it vanished into the black void of the sea. He watched the lights twinkle through the haze of his own breath. His body railed against being exposed to the cold and sent violent shivers over his body.

His reasoned mind, too, spoke up in protest. It preached sermons against his zealous heart. What did he hope to gain from this? What if his theory about Shepard and the Reapers was true? What would it change? Shepard wasn’t coming back.

He ignored all of this. He glanced heavenward and then at the time again. Almost.

23:24

The second the new minute hit, one of the Reapers that had been gliding across the sky changed course. It headed straight for Kaidan. Exhilaration pulsed through him as he moved to the edge of the building. Within moments, the Reaper slowed to a stop so close to him he thought he might be able to take a running jump and grasp the side of the ship.

The monstrous hulk filled his vision. It became his world. He felt like an ant against a human heel - insignificant.

His chest heaved but not from terror. He waited for it to repeat the same pattern it did every night. He’d noticed the behavior nearly a month ago and it had taken him this long to understand what the Reaper was doing. Now, he could not only understand but he intended to respond.

The ship began to strobe. Every light on its hull blinked on and off in unison. A bystander might assume the ship were struggling to maintain power. It’s what Kaidan had thought the first few times he’d seen it. Yet, it was always the same pattern. Always the same time.

Kaidan knew it now to be morse code. It spelled the same thing every night:

S-A-N-I-T-Y C-H-E-C-K

He’d learned the letters of the code now and had come ready to ask questions.

“Sh - Shepard?” His voice caught and cracked against his nerves, so it didn’t come out as loudly as he’d meant it to. He opened his mouth to speak again but his voice failed entirely. He squeezed the lamp cradled in his palm - his back up plan.

Please be in there. Talk to me.

His mind screamed at him, demanding to be heard. What if Shepard wasn’t behind this odd behavior and wasn’t even in there? No. The place. The time. More than a coincidence. Had to be.

Then what if he was in there? What would that mean? The implications staggered him if he dwelt on the matter too much. So he didn’t.

He had to know. Had to try. Simple as that. So he waited.

Nothing, at first. Then it began to blink a reply: S-H-E-P-A-R-D

Kaidan didn’t know if that was an answer or a question. Damn it, Shepard, just speak to me!

Movement pulled his attention away from the monstrous ship in front of him. To his right, another Reaper descended. And another to his left. He spun around and discovered a total of six more ships encircling him.

Fear surfaced for the first time but he drowned it with determination. He turned back to the original ship and stepped up on the ledge of the building.

“Shepard, is that you? Please,” he choked on the tears that bubbled in his throat. “I have to know.”

Wind whipped his hair and he wrapped his arms around his chest.

The ship began to strobe. No, all of them did. They replied as one.

K-A-I-D-A-N

He did the last thing he would have expected. He laughed. Something released within him and gurgled in his throat. It poured from his eyes. The lights from the Reapers refracted through his tears as they spelled his name over and over while he stood and wept. And laughed.

When he found his voice again, he called out. This time, nothing constricted his throat as he shouted across the night. “Shepard, I love you!”

It was all he could say. All he needed to say. All of the questions, the list of things that he didn’t understand - they all dissolved in the presence of this one declaration.

The Reaper ships showed no hesitation this time as they spelled out the reply.

A-L-W-A-Y-S

Kaidan felt his legs go weak and sat down, his feet dangling over the oblivious city below. He watched them ascend and float away. Despite the cold, he sat and sat and cried and cried.

Mostly from joy.

He had so few answers still. But he had the one answer that he needed most: that Shepard existed somewhere and that he still loved Kaidan.

_Always._


End file.
